Sunday, December 18, 2011

I got three letters for ya, S E X

This morning I woke up incredibly aroused. It was the kind of feeling that occurs right before, or right after great sex. I don't remember exactly what I dreamt. All I know is I took a long time for me to leave my sleep and enter the world again, and when I did, the feeling was overwhelming.

As a married woman, sex should be no problem. It should be like water in the fridge. Available at any time and yet, that isn't always the case. This is when I thought of you, of us in general, and how we handle this stuff. I am sure we have all had moments when we were left wanting. Waiting for that release, touch, moment. Wishing for sex.

So what's the best way to go about this? The biggest problem for me is the moment it becomes cerebral. I'm a highly analytical Virgo. I think a lot about every thing. All day long. The moment I have to think about sex, I'm over it. I want to be taken away. Lead. Shown. Sex for me isn't in the brain. It's in the heart, it's in the feeel of it. It's not that I don't know what to do or how to do it. It's just that in my day to day life I call a lot of the shots. I designed it that way. Sex is one area, I'd like to relinquish control.

I think a lot of women are like me. A lot of us aren't thrown into orgasmic fits by just looking at something. A lot of us can and will rock the worlds of our partners but don't want to call the shots in bed. I mean, outside of a porn star or dominatrix, how many women have you known or spoken to that do?

Perhaps this is all too much. Too personal. I apologize in advance if it seems left field but Tee-riffic is about living our best life and the various paths taken in experiencing that. I'll be damned if sex is not part of it. I wondered, how many other women feel like me? How many men?

This morning, I tried to convey my aroused state to my hubby. I told him. He then seemed perplexed and more concerned at what I could've dreamt about. It was like an episode of "Up All Night." Real. Mundane. Comical. Slightly frustrating.

What could I have done differently? What is a way, we can convey what we like or want without running the whole session? Hurting our partners feelings? Or turning it into, GASP, a chat session?

In all fairness, I am sure there have been many times I have left my husband wanting. This is not about him being a problem. This is about starting a dialogue about what we like and what we want. So then we could start to get it.

Sexy dream or not.

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